


Delicate as a soap bubble, strong as steel

by Fruitbird15



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Asexual Caduceus, Avantika mention, Cuddles, Fluff, Greyace Fjord, M/M, Sabian mention, Sex repulsed Fjord, baths, non sexual nudity, queer platonic partnership
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:28:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27674711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fruitbird15/pseuds/Fruitbird15
Summary: "He doesn't know what this thing they have is.If it even is a thing.It's...something. There's no denying it. No friendship feels like this."Fjord muses on him and Caduceus.
Relationships: Caduceus Clay/Fjord
Comments: 12
Kudos: 119





	Delicate as a soap bubble, strong as steel

**Author's Note:**

> Content warning, reference is made to Sabian and Avantika, with implications of unhealthy relationships. So just a heads up.

He doesn't know what this thing they have is.

If it even is a thing.

It's...something. There's no denying it. No friendship feels like this. 

He lightly taps on the door to Caduceus' room, ensconced safely in Caleb's tower. There's the soft sound of footsteps and the door opens, Caduceus smiling lightly down at him.

The world shifts, settles. Comes right once more. The small smile is a lighthouse of safety and Fjord basks in it.

“Come on in. I was just setting up.”

Incense is already burning in the meditation area, and Fjord settles down alongside his...mentor? Friend? Something else?

He doesn't know if it's love, mentally shies away from that word. He'd never fully understood that, why his fellow children seemed to lose their minds the minute they were teens and he'd remained behind. He'd tried. Gods knows he'd tried to feel normal. 

Sabian left a bad taste in his thoughts for older reasons than the betrayal.

But he couldn't deny he wanted that, in some small way. Wanted to be seen. To be known. To be cared for. 

And Caduceus was all of that, in spades. 

Shaking his head clear, he settles down next to Caduceus and lets his thoughts settle, breathing out and letting the Wildmother be felt. It's as easy as breathing now.

He drifts like this for what seems like hours, but when Caduceus gently shakes him, the incense has only just burnt out, wisps of fragrant smoke curling lightly in the air.

“I drew a bath, if you want to get ready for bed.”

“Sure, Deucy. You go first, I need to clean my armour.”

A large hand grips his shoulder, lightly squeezes, and Caduceus pads over to the bathtub behind the screen. Unbidden, Fjords hand brushes the spot he touched, the warmth lingering.

Letting his hands take over the ritual of unbuckling and inspecting his armour, Fjord's thoughts drift.

This can't be a friendship, what they have. This feels more intimate, more gentle. Friends don't hold hands tightly after a battle, sleep in the same bed, gaze into each other's eyes with such openness.

But lovers don't shy away from touches like Fjord does. Lovers kiss and giggle and stare with mingled love and desire. 

It feels tenuous yet strong at the same time, as delicate as a soap bubble and as strong as steel. A solid foundation beneath his feet, a star to steer by, yet if he breathes on it or touches it, it'll burst...

“I'm done, it's all yours.” 

Caduceus steps out from behind the screen, toweling off his long pink hair. He's naked, unashamedly so, and Fjord averts his gaze on reflex. Bodies and the things they can do...well...

Avantika had been necessary. He tries not to think about her these days, twice dead Avantika with mocking eyes and rough hands...

He pushes those thoughts back to the dark place they came and steps behind the screen, undressing and relaxing into the hot water. The water still smells of the chamomile soap Caduceus uses, and he closes his eyes and takes in the scent. Comforting. Familiar.

The hot water surrounds him like a hug and he drifts again, wondering if he should bring this up with Caduceus. Ask him if he feels like this too, feels that safety and rightness and strangeness between them. Risk breaching that delicate bubble and make the terrifying ordeal of being known.

He finishes his bathing and clambers out of the tub, dripping wet. With a grin he gestures, and the water pulls from his body with a faint chill, drying him instantly. Slipping into his bedclothes, he pads out into the main bedroom. Caduceus has made tea, two cups steaming gently side by side.

A nightly ritual.

The firbolg chuckles.

“Your hair is very fluffy.” 

Fjord just grins, kneeling at the table and taking up his tea. Breathing in the scent, he drinks. It's rosehip tea, sweet and floral. They drink in warm, comfortable silence. At one point, he glances up and catches Caduceus' eyes, warm and all knowing. Still waters running deep. The corners of his eyes crinkle in a smile and Fjord smiles back, resisting the urge to look away, like he was caught doing something wrong.

When they finish, Caduceus stands with a stretch.

“Bed?”

“Yeah. The cold takes it out of you, I'm exhausted.”

The bed is warm and unbelievably soft as he climbs in, Caduceus following. There's a crowded little moment as they get comfortable, a brief tangle of long firbolg limbs and half orc muscle, before they settle, Caduceus laying back and opening his arms for Fjord. 

This. This is worth it. Whatever thing they have between them, this strangeness. All worth it for the sheer bliss of these moments. Fjord tucks himself into Caduceus' side with a sigh, a long arm wrapping around his shoulders and stroking his hair as the half orc tucks his head into the hollow of his neck, a space that seems to fit perfectly. They melt into each other, Fjord draping an arm over Caduceus' chest, their legs a tangle. Skin pressed to softly furred skin. 

(He'd never known how much he needed this until he had it.)

“Goodnight, Fjord.”

“'Night, Deucy.”

In moments, Caduceus is sleeping, snoring softly. Fjord luxuriates a little longer in the feeling, eyes shut yet still awake as he inhales, filling his lungs with the smell of grave moss and chamomile. He could ask. Could rouse his sleeping...what? Partner? Partner seems closest to this nameless thing they have. Could ask him if he feels as safe with Fjord as Fjord does with him. If he feels this thing that isn't love but isn't just a friendship either.

The hand cradling his head shifts slightly, stroking his hair as Caduceus mumbles something in half heard Sylvan, and Fjord puts the thought out of his head for now as the sensation of blunt fingers combing idly through his hair turns his bones to putty.

Later. He can ask later.

The sound of his partner's heartbeat, slow and steady and strong, lulls him to sleep. Safe and warm and secure.


End file.
